Adoptive Families: Dealing with the Questions.

A couple of weeks ago, I blogged about things that are often said to adoptive parents, ranging from innocent, well-meaning statements to ones that are downright offensive. But here's the thing -- I can beg on my blog until I'm blue in the face for people to use terms  "biological child" and "birth mom", but the questions and comments will still come, and I have to figure out how to handle my own responses appropriately. While we were in the process to bring Baby Boy home, there was so much … [Read more...]

The Adoptees’ Voices.

So if you haven't seen it, there's AMAZING conversations happening over on a post I penned last week. With the input of some close friends, I shared -- in my own sarcastic way -- comments that are made to us that can be invasive, hurtful and/or upsetting -- to our children as well as to us. I've really enjoyed seeing the response. Adoptive parents, birth mothers, adoptees, prospective adoptive parents, friends and family of adoptive parents are all weighing in. For the most part, everyone has … [Read more...]

Ten Things NOT to Say to Adoptive Parents.

A few days ago my 10 months pregnant friend at The Measured Mom posted a great list of things NOT to say to a pregnant woman, and politely suggest some alternatives.  I laughed out loud reading some of them, remembering how many of them were said to me -- and, shamefully, how many I have said to my pregnant friends, since I have forgotten what it's like to walk around with another human being inside of you! When I'm with my fellow adoptive girlfriends, you will often hear us say, "Oh, you … [Read more...]

Special Needs Adoption.

You guys HAVE to go check out the Encompass Blog today. My old high school chum, Megan, who has always had a beautiful way with words, is sharing her adoption story about her beautiful little girl who suffers from vision loss: "I don’t FEEL special or worthy or in any way qualified to be Libby’s mama. But at the same time, I KNOW beyond the shadow of a doubt that she is the daughter that God had planned for me from before eternity. He didn’t give me any special gifts over and above the gifts … [Read more...]

What You Need to Know About Adopting Toddlers.

If you follow me over on the Encompass blog, you may know about an adoption series I'm doing over there called "What You Need to Know", featuring different stories from adoptive families. So far, I've had the privilege of "interviewing" two amazing sets of parents, who have shared their stories about fostering a child and adopting an older, waiting child internationally. I've reached out to other adoptive parents who will soon be sharing their stories about their adoption experiences, and … [Read more...]

Raising Kids Who Aren’t Racists.

There are times when I think that our country has come so far. I adopted a child with a completely different color skin than mine who has been embraced by a largely white community. We elected our first African American president. Twice. Way to go us! Not to belittle those milestones, but this week I'm not feeling that way. At all. Maybe it was Megyn Kelly's whole "Santa Clause is white" bit or Duck Dynasty's Phil Robertson's sickening insinuation in GQ magazine that blacks were … [Read more...]

Adoption Book Reports and A Few Announcements.

One of the blogs that I really enjoy is Mother, Daughter and Son Book Reviews. The website is exactly what it sounds like -- a mom and her kiddo(s) reviewing a book! It inspired me to start a book review type feature of my own -- but this one is going to have a theme. I'm calling it Adoption Book Reports and you will be able to read parent-child reviews of books that promote/discuss adoption and/or diversity. We love found that books addressing adoption and issues relevant to adoption through … [Read more...]

Foster Care.

I'd love it if you would check out the Encompass Blog today. A local friend graciously agreed to share her foster care story with me to publish on the Encompass blog. You can read about her experience caring for her foster son during the first year of his life before returning him to his birth mom. It's a beautiful testimony of God's faithfulness in all things. … [Read more...]

If You’re Considering Adoption…

The other day, a fellow adoptive mama shared a really tragic article on her Facebook wall. The article relayed the unbelievably awful story of an Ethiopian adoptee who died as a result of abuse and neglect from her adoptive family. It went on to detail other instances where Christian adoptive families have abused, neglected or treated their adopted children with indifference. I absolutely cringe when I read an article like this. I cringe because it is awful and horrific to think of this … [Read more...]

Respecting the Rules.

Okay friends...I'm blogging about some heavy stuff tonight. And I hope you will understand that it comes from someone who loves adoption and doesn't want to point fingers or lay blame. Here's the deal: I was not at all surprised when the DGM in Congo announced the suspension of exit letters for up to twelve months. I was unbelievably saddened -- especially for the sister whose side I have been next to for the entire process and have witnessed endure one delay after another. But I was not … [Read more...]